Part 4: Submission Is Biblical, but Control Is Not
When Spiritual Authority Crosses the Line
“Submit to your leaders.”
That’s biblical.
“Obey your pastor.”
Depending on what is meant, that statement can reflect biblical truth.
“Don’t rebel against spiritual authority.”
Again, Scripture takes rebellion, disorder, pride, and divisiveness seriously.
But sometimes the conversation goes even further.
“Don’t question your leader.”
“God told me what you’re supposed to do.”
“If you disagree with me, you’re in rebellion.”
“You can’t leave this church unless I release you.”
“If you leave without my blessing, you’re stepping outside God’s protection.”
“You need my permission before you pursue that ministry.”
“Your job is to submit even when you think I’m wrong.”
At this point, we need to ask another question:
Is that biblical submission—or spiritual control?
These are not the same thing.
The Bible teaches spiritual authority.
The Bible teaches pastoral oversight.
The Bible teaches submission.
The Bible teaches honor.
But Scripture never gives human leaders unlimited authority over another believer’s life.
Every pastor is under Christ.
Every elder is under Christ.
Every apostle is under Christ.
Every prophet is under Christ.
Every teacher is under Christ.
And every believer ultimately belongs to Christ.
So biblical submission must always stay within biblical boundaries.
HEBREWS 13:17 IS REAL
We shouldn’t avoid passages simply because people have misused them.
Hebrews 13:17 teaches believers to respond appropriately to their leaders because those leaders keep watch over their souls as those who will give an account.
This is a serious responsibility.
God expects pastors and spiritual leaders actually to lead.
A pastor isn’t merely someone who gives a sermon once a week.
Shepherds watch.
Shepherds guide.
Shepherds warn.
Shepherds protect.
Shepherds correct.
Shepherds sometimes have to say difficult things.
Believers also shouldn’t get offended every time spiritual leadership challenges them.
Sometimes the pastor isn’t trying to control you.
Sometimes he’s correcting you.
There is an important difference.
Sometimes the leader isn’t trying to manipulate you.
He’s trying to protect you from something you cannot yet see.
Sometimes what we call “control” is actually godly counsel we don’t want to hear.
Let’s make this clear:
Biblical submission is real.
But Hebrews 13:17 gives leaders responsibility.
But it does not give them absolute authority.
THE LEADER WILL GIVE AN ACCOUNT
Hebrews 13:17 contains something leaders should notice as much as followers.
Leaders are described as people who will give an account.
To whom?
God.
That means the leader isn’t the highest authority in the relationship.
The leader himself is under authority.
Every sermon preached.
Every correction given.
Every decision made.
Every person counseled.
Every exercise of church discipline.
Every use of spiritual influence.
Pastors will answer to God for how they handled His people.
This should keep spiritual leaders from becoming arrogant.
The congregation isn’t the pastor’s personal kingdom.
The church isn’t the pastor’s possession.
The people don’t belong to the preacher.
Jesus purchased the Church with His blood.
Pastors are stewards.
And stewards answer to the Owner.
PETER PUTS LIMITS ON LEADERSHIP
Peter speaks directly to elders in1 Peter 5:2–3.
He tells them to shepherd God’s flock and exercise oversight.
Notice both ideas.
Shepherd.
Oversee.
Those are authority words.
But then Peter immediately establishes boundaries.
He tells leaders not to exercise their ministry through compulsion, greed, or“lording it over those entrusted to you.”
Instead, they are to set an example.
This is very important.
Biblical leaders have authority.
But they are specifically forbidden from becoming domineering.
Jesus said something similar.
JESUS REDEFINED GREATNESS
InMatthew 20:25–28, Jesus contrasts kingdom leadership with worldly leadership.
The rulers of the Gentiles “lord it over” people.
Jesus says:
“It must not be like that among you.”
Instead, whoever wants to become great must become a servant.
Jesus doesn’t eliminate leadership.
He changes it.
Worldly authority says:
“You exist to serve my vision.”
Kingdom authority says:
“God has entrusted me with responsibility to serve you.”
Worldly leadership asks:
“How many people answer to me?”
Kingdom leadership asks:
“How faithfully am I serving the people God entrusted to me?”
Worldly leadership protects the leader’s position.
Kingdom leadership protects the sheep.
This difference is important.
SUBMISSION DOESN’T MEAN SURRENDERING DISCERNMENT
One of the most dangerous misunderstandings of spiritual submission is the idea that submitting to leadership means surrendering your responsibility to discern truth.
Scripture never teaches that.
Consider the Bereans.
Paul and Silas arrive in Berea and begin teaching.
These people are listening to an apostle.
Not just any preacher.
Paul.
Yet Acts 17:11tells us they examined the Scriptures daily to see whether what Paul taught was true.
And Luke calls them noble for doing it.
Consider this.
They checked an apostle’s teaching against Scripture.
And the Bible praises them.
Imagine if Paul had responded:
“How dare you question my teaching! I’m God’s apostle!”
He didn’t.
Because genuine spiritual authority isn’t afraid of Scripture.
Healthy pastors should want people checking what they preach.
Open your Bible.
Read the context.
Ask questions.
Study.
Search.
Compare.
If what I preach cannot survive an open Bible, you shouldn’t believe it simply because I am standing behind a pulpit.
The pastor isn’t the final authority.
Scripture is.
YOU CAN HONOR SOMEONE AND STILL DISAGREE
The Church needs to recover this.
Disagreement isn’t automatically dishonor.
Questions aren’t automatically rebellion.
Concern isn’t automatically division.
A believer can say:
“Pastor, I love you and respect you, but I don’t believe that interpretation is correct.”
That’s possible.
A church member can disagree with a ministry decision without becoming an enemy.
A leader can receive criticism without assuming the critic is demonically influenced.
A mature leader doesn’t need everyone to agree with him to feel respected.
In fact, secure leaders can listen.
They may ultimately disagree.
They may maintain their decision.
Leadership sometimes requires that.
But they don’t need to demonize everybody who asks questions spiritually.
PAUL WAS CORRECTED—AND CORRECTED OTHERS
Consider Galatians 2.
Peter was a prominent apostle.
He walked with Jesus.
He witnessed the resurrection.
He preached at Pentecost.
Thousands responded to his preaching.
Yet Paul tells us that when Peter acted wrongly at Antioch:
“I opposed him to his face because he stood condemned.”
—Galatians 2:11
Peter’s position didn’t make him beyond correction.
Imagine Peter responding:
“Paul, be careful. Touch not God’s anointed.”
That’s not what Scripture records.
Even apostles were accountable to truth.
This is extremely important.
If Peter could be confronted, your pastor can be confronted.
If Peter could be wrong, your apostle can be wrong.
If Peter could make a bad decision, your bishop can make a bad decision.
If Peter’s title didn’t make him infallible, neither does anyone else’s.
“GOD TOLD ME” CAN BECOME A WEAPON
One of the easiest ways spiritual leadership becomes controlling is through claims of divine revelation.
A leader says:
“God told me you’re supposed to…”
Now what happens?
If you disagree with the pastor, you’re no longer simply disagreeing with the pastor.
You’re supposedly disagreeing with God.
This puts a lot of pressure on people.
We should be extremely careful when speaking for God.
Sometimes the Holy Spirit gives someone insight, wisdom, prophetic encouragement, or conviction about another person.
But New Testament prophecy isn’t presented as something believers receive without discernment.
1 Corinthians 14:29says that prophets should speak and others should evaluate.
Evaluate.
Discern.
Test.
Similarly, 1 Thessalonians 5:20–21 tells believers not to despise prophecies but to test all things and hold on to what is good.
So even when someone says:
“I believe God showed me something for you,”
The biblical response is not blind obedience.
It is discernment.
A healthy leader understands that.
COUNSEL IS DIFFERENT FROM CONTROL
Suppose someone comes to a pastor and says:
“I’m thinking about marrying this person.”
A good pastor might say:
“I have serious concerns.”
He may point out character issues.
He may identify warning signs.
He may provide biblical counsel.
He may strongly advise against the marriage.
The believer would be foolish to dismiss wise counsel simply because they don’t like it.
But there’s a difference between:
“As your pastor, I strongly believe marrying this person would be unwise, and here’s why…”
and:
“God has placed me over you, and you are forbidden from marrying this person without my permission.”
One is pastoral counsel.
The other approach may become controlling.
The same applies to:
Where you work.
Where you live.
Whether you buy a house.
Whether you start a business.
Who your friends are.
What ministry you pursue.
Whether you move to another city.
Whether you attend another church.
Wise believers look for good advice.
But pastors are not a substitute for the Holy Spirit.
CAN YOU LEAVE A CHURCH?
This is another area where spiritual control sometimes appears.
A member feels God leading them somewhere else.
Leadership responds:
“You cannot leave until we release you.”
Where exactly does the New Testament establish that requirement?
Now, there are good and bad ways to leave churches.
Leaving because you’re angry over correction may reveal immaturity.
Leaving while spreading gossip is wrong.
Leaving to avoid reconciliation isn’t healthy.
Leaving every church whenever someone tells you something you don’t want to hear will keep you from growing.
Whenever possible, believers should leave graciously.
Have conversations.
Seek reconciliation.
Honor people.
Try not to end relationships on bad terms if you can avoid it.
But the idea that a pastor must spiritually “release” a Christian before that Christian can attend another congregation is difficult to establish from Scripture.
Pastors shepherd God’s people.
They don’t own them.
MUTUAL SUBMISSION MATTERS TOO
Discussions of submission often focus exclusively on what church members owe leaders.
But the New Testament contains a broader culture of humility.
Ephesians 5:21says:
“submitting to one another in the fear of Christ.”
Christian community isn’t supposed to be built around everyone fighting for position.
We serve one another.
Listen to one another.
Honor one another.
Bear one another’s burdens.
Correct one another.
Forgive one another.
Encourage one another.
Leadership exists within that family.
Pastors don’t graduate out of being brothers.
Elders don’t graduate out of needing correction.
Teachers don’t graduate out of needing accountability.
Apostles don’t graduate out of humility.
Everybody remains under Christ.
CONTROL CREATES DEPENDENCY
This is one of the clearest warning signs.
Healthy leadership produces maturity.
Controlling leadership produces dependency.
Healthy leadership teaches you Scripture.
Controlling leadership teaches you to depend upon the leader’s interpretation.
Healthy leadership teaches you to pray.
Controlling leadership makes you believe the leader hears God better than you ever could.
Healthy leadership gives counsel.
Controlling leadership requires permission.
Healthy leadership welcomes questions.
Controlling leadership labels questions rebellion.
Healthy leadership admits mistakes.
Controlling leadership protects its image.
Healthy leadership releases people into ministry.
Controlling leadership makes ministry revolve around loyalty to the leader.
Healthy leadership points people toward Jesus.
Controlling leadership gradually positions the leader between people and Jesus.
PAUL REFUSED TO LORD OVER FAITH
Once again, Paul’s statement in2 Corinthians 1:24gives us an extraordinary standard:
“I do not mean that we lord it over your faith, but we are workers with you for your joy, because you stand by faith.”
Workers with you.
That’s apostolic authority speaking.
Paul could correct.
Paul could confront.
Paul could discipline.
Paul could teach.
Yet he understood there was a boundary.
Your faith belongs to God.
THE ANSWER ISN’T REBELLION
We need to be equally clear about the opposite error.
Some believers use “Jesus is my authority” as an excuse for refusing all accountability.
Nobody can correct them.
Nobody can question them.
Nobody can tell them they’re wrong.
They bounce from church to church.
They reject pastors.
They refuse correction.
Then they call their independence “freedom.”
This is not true biblical freedom.
Sometimes God uses leaders to tell us things we desperately need to hear.
Sometimes submission means accepting correction when our flesh wants to fight.
Sometimes honoring leadership means trusting a decision we wouldn’t personally make.
Sometimes spiritual maturity means admitting:
“My pastor was right, and I was wrong.”
So the answer to controlling leadership isn’t rebellious Christianity.
The answer is biblical leadership and biblical submission.
CHRIST DEFINES THE BOUNDARIES
The ultimate question isn’t:
“Do I have to submit?”
The better question is:
“What does biblical submission look like under the lordship of Christ?”
Jesus remains Lord.
Scripture remains authoritative.
Pastors remain shepherds.
Elders remain overseers.
Believers remain accountable.
The Church remains a family.
And nobody gets to take Jesus’ seat.
Healthy spiritual authority doesn’t say:
“You need me to control your life.”
It says:
“God has entrusted me with responsibility to help you follow Jesus faithfully.”
Healthy submission doesn’t say:
“I’ll surrender my conscience to another human being.”
It says:
“I will walk humbly, receive biblical correction, honor godly leadership, seek wise counsel, remain teachable, and ultimately obey Jesus.”
This is not rebellion.
This is maturity.
And perhaps the simplest test for any spiritual authority structure is this:
Does it make Jesus more necessary—or the leader more necessary?
If leadership consistently points people toward Christ, Scripture, maturity, service, and personal responsibility before God, something healthy is happening.
But if people become afraid to make decisions without the leader…
Afraid to ask questions…
Afraid to disagree…
Afraid to leave…
Afraid to test what they’re being taught…
Afraid that God’s protection will disappear if they disappoint their leader…
Clearly, something is wrong in this situation.
Because Jesus didn’t die to transfer us from the bondage of sin into the bondage of religious control.
He brought us into His family.
And within that family there is leadership.
There is authority.
There is accountability.
There is submission.
But above all of this is Jesus Christ.
Submission is biblical.
Control is not.
COMING IN PART 5
“Touch Not My Anointed”
What That Verse Actually Means
Few phrases have been used more effectively to silence questions about spiritual leadership:
“Touch not God’s anointed.”
But what did that statement originally mean?
Was Scripture teaching Christians never to question pastors, prophets, apostles, or other leaders?
Does criticizing a preacher mean you’re “touching the anointed”?
And if God’s leaders are never supposed to be confronted, what do we do withNathan confronting David, Paul confronting Peter, Samuel confronting Saul, and the New Testament’s repeated commands to test teaching?
In Part 5, we’re going back to Psalm 105, 1 Chronicles 16, 1 Samuel 24, Galatians 2, and the broader biblical context to examine one of the most frequently misunderstood phrases concerning spiritual authority.
Because honoring God’s leaders is biblical.
But using Scripture to make leaders untouchable is not.
Thoughts from Pastor Toney 